Which she occasionally changes without telling me. Other than just standing by waiting for it to change how can we change it ? When you have kids you cannot afford, or when you cannot afford to give them the life that . Being an advocate for family law reform, I can assure you that there are 10s of thousands of guys who would agree with him. If, as a dad, you accept that you have not been managing the cost of similar freedoms in the Maryland family courts as to your child's mom, a Maryland father's rights lawyer can help. Well if thats the case why cant she be held to this same standard? The first step is recognizing that this is a Parental Rights issue and not a Fathers Rights issue. Im in Illinois btw.. Jamie I can relate. She would stay in bed til 2 pm and get up and make herself food. Tell me what about his Physical needs he is losing his Wife sometimes Wife herself wanted Divorce for her so called Freedom to Dance, go everywhere with maybe men, and he lost his kids. Under the current child support "guidelines" the following factors are RARELY considered by a judge when he or she sets a child support amount: The amount of time each parent has physical custody of the child. Child Support was intended as a TRANSFER OF WEALTH scam. My turn. No tax breaks for the dads. you do to the other side of the equation, it remains equal. I was my kids only involved parent, only disciplinary, only actual oarticipator in their rearing. Current Child Support Laws Are a Barrier to True Shared ParentingExcellent article. At the very least rebooted it is definitely getting old. For young fathers who are struggling with finishing school or entering a new job, being ordered to pay child support until the child becomes an adult is challenging, even if the amount is minimal. You dont own them. Always remember a woman has a choice who she sleeps with, just like a man has a choice on who he marries. 3. This shoehorns men and women into sexist roles, with men forced to be the breadwinner. If a threat follows a demand, its extortion. It is not about bitterness The curry court system is one sided. Know that, your child in not a ward of any state, it is yours. Thought I would mention, there are numerous laws on the books, not statues, but laws! That becomes a very slippery slope for a lot of dads. I havent seen my daughter in over 3 years due to the fact my ex found out I was getting married and was having a child with my wife. 1 Million Fathers Against The Corrupt Child Support System In America | Houston TX This is Maryland. get all the tax breaks like earned income tax credit, child care credit, and they can deduct the kids from their income. Child Support Enforcement can be a tool to ensure those dads (and moms) who voluntarily decide not to support their children are forced too, but these laws need to be revamped significantly. I really find it concerning that so many women are misinformed about the way child support works. My bf is an amazing dad and from day one tried his best to be an active parent. You make wild assumption that mothers use the child support for the kid and daycare It is often not the case, even my own mom (a good mom) still used the system to throw my dad in jail for missed payments in the 1985. Having children is. Here are all the reasons why child support is is unfair to dads: Child support is built on the presumption that one parent (mothers) care for the children while another (father) pays for them. I struggled for 8 years with 3 daughters to avoid as much drama as possible, never sued him, he took me to court to get a reduction after he had not paid the first year a dime. Why, if we made this change because it would be of great help to our living and financial problems we were going through. "It's a case of, 'Get your lazy behind off the couch,'" Trout says of judges addressing stay-at-home dads, adding that he heard one judge say almost precisely that. When he called child support this week and essentially asked them to reconsider and/or issue a temporary license due to his situation they told him flat out that there was nothing they can do and he still owes regular payments even without having a source of income. I have to agree with you. They view child support as "extortion" instead of taking care of their responsibilities to their children. More importantly, I want her to have a good relationship with her dad, as I know too many women who have issues because of the kind of relationship they had with their dad, or lack thereof. Why is child support so unfair to fathers? Women can get wic, medicaid, and snap (food stamps). support the brandon jones act in wa state. Her mother lost the case in civil court and that made her mad enough to try to change custody. This means that a judge can still order child support even if both parents state they do not need it. So dad now owes 2 years in back support and in a lot of cases the mother is making 2 to 3 times what the father did before he was injured . Bipolar disorder runs in her family unfortunately, I wish I was making this up but its the harsh reality we live in. I dont do drugs, drink, or smoke, but hell if I have a pot to piss in. The payments were so high I eventually became homeless. Whenever Dad makes more $, he gets taken back to court to pay more $. Your email address will not be published. I quit even trying to collect in 2009. File for full custody. The office then says they cant do anything about it , if he is not there. They do consider the extra mouths to feed at 2.5% of the total. Costs to raise a child should be split 50/50. Not true for MO. I had all 3 of our kids full time and I worked full time. But the system is unjust. So there are fathers who pay religiously just to get the shaft. But life would go on, and the times would be pulled through. Every child needs a loving and caring mother and father, even if not together. My dad was a terrible husband but was a great father. She has No accountability, and there is no equality whatsoever. So she wanted a divorce. Its easier for the courts when there is one custodial parent who gets regular, guideline child support from the other (noncustodial parent), but its worse for the children. But i have a pick set in my gear so I opened the door. He tried to be as involved as he was allowed. Find the father (usually) so he can help to financially aid the family. They are taught that any form of punishment is child abuse of some form, and that they can forever blame their short-comings in life upon their childhood, shrowded with falsehoods and depictions of even the most blatent displays of affectionate parenting as some form of neglect or abuse, tainting their entire upbringing, that could have been fairly peaceful and normal had the number one focus been on raising the children to the best of our ability as co-parents. 51% deadbeat MOM, by current Wa. I just think a lot of these stories are twisted and about anger and bitterness over the dissolved relationship, kids are suffering & going without because of this. like for example with the income tax.. A lot of you may not have noticed this but, when they take your income taxes you are really paying child support with money that child support already came from and I think its very unfair if you start off in the hole, but you make regular monthly payments and still be subject to tax offset. Dont seem like you can no matter how hard you try. While if my husband missed one payment, the courts would be all over him, calling him a deadbeat. (yes fair and equal treatment under the law). Also I had a garnishment of 9000 held in limbo for 15 months where it was not applied to my child support for that entire time. Both parents income IS EXACTLY WHAT GENERATES THE AMOUNT THE COURTS DEFINE AS NECESSARY. It was wasted time and energy. The insanity did not stop until I declared BANKRUPTCY the best option out there to stop the bleeding and financial harassment.My opinion examine your total ex spousal obligations with a bankruptcy attorney . The self-support reserve would allow enforcement sanctions to be focused on the true deadbeat parent while allowing deadbroke parents to receive job training and social service referrals to give them the opportunity to become self-supporting and better able to provide for themselves and their children while being shielded from administrative sanctions (such as drivers license suspensions) that can cost a parent their job. If you say its just bevause of visitation your WRONG. Imagine having to come home from work to cook dinner, clean, help with homework (and those science projects take some effort) and spend a little quality time with the kids before heading to bed, then waking up to do it all over again the next day!!! All she needs to do is provide information about the father to them, and direct contact with the father is unnecessary. So enter a judges job But its just a job to the judge so status quo is what you get. Once I informed her of this it she began to avoid my calls, msgs. Section 8 housing, TEACH/FSEOG college funds, welfare, WIC, and numerous other benefits that is not even including child support. What do I do? When 54% of my paycheck goes to my ex and 46% goes to my family of 5 how is that fair. They dont honor cap. The National Parents Organization states, "Long ago and far away there was a land in which non-custodial fathers paid child support directly to the custodial motherIn the 1970s, child support collection, disbursement and accounting became a function of government instead." #childsupport #indigentfathers #americancorruptfamilylaw Talk to your father, get nosey, ask questions. The government should not have to get involved because you married the wrong guy. Children do grow up and I have a 8 year old daughter that I would have a HARD time spending that on. The current calculated guideline DO NOT take into account the basic survival needs of the father. Why does the custodial parent need daycare? Have any of you contacted an elected official or one that running for office? The mother had full custody. I definitely agree but by that same token there are parents who are expected to pay over $1000/month to a parent who doesnt even make that to support a child. Finally when the three your time it was up we got paperwork saying we could request a modification it took four months before we got any response after the request and now even though the mother said the kids do not live with her he is having to prove that they live with him before they will change anything. Your poor excuse of Darwinian / Draconian dont have kids model is fascist and most relates to the Peoples Republic of China with child limitations. The age of the children. Modern child support rules expect both parents to be working, and support rules are meant to maintain the standard of living the children had before the divorce, also to equalize living standards across households if the NCP makes a ton of money and the CP doesnt. Thats half my take home too! My father is a firefighter/ paramedic and makes a fairly good income but is struggling financially because he has to pay child support to my mother even though he has custody. It was not my choice for her to cheat From that moment on, I accrued interest on that 16,000with an astronomical percentage, and have also paid OVER 50% of my checksince Ive been 18. Paying 300, 500 per month?? Hopefully for future dads and kids the system can be changed. Morally and ethically maybe but the government should not be mandating how or if someone raises their kid. I was in my childs life before she even was born. Someone in charge needs to change the system. Just told me what I was going to pay based off what I made they didnt consider my other cases now on top of that she jumped up took my kids out of school and moved to a different city called child support and they said she can do what she want. System is outdated and unfair. We have no visitation schedules, as long as it doesnt interfere with school he can get her/see her whenever he/she wants/ is able. What world are you living in? 3 talking about this. Both man and woman decide to take responsibility of that action equally. We can help get a repeal of the Social Security Act Title IV, Part D, Section 458. It is mind boggling to me that these people think it costs so little to care for children. THEY WANT THIS STATUS QUO! Than i ask why was nothing ever produced that she was going to school, they said its not our job to do that. I know there are genuinely some men who want their children and are great fathers, and I applaud and support them in this battle. I encourage our law makers to do whats right and truely make the necessary changes. I hope for someone to help us but I feel we are only two of thousands stuck in a system thats easily manipulated! She tries to make my visitation as hard as possible and lies to my daughter every chance she gets. I work full time and receive a $250-300 check every 2 weeks. He completely has controlled our lives and finances for the last four years. And guess what lets say she gets $300 in welfare, and your order is $200 or $100, you dont have to pay $300-the state eats the debt and tax payers support the rest of your childs needs. Child support an child support court are all biaist. She also has full medical from me. Only for her to go for child support which she never paid to him she was barley in their childrens lives before they were 3 and 4 . Shut off the spigot to the states and the states are less motivated to enforce child support. Worat thing is my son wont see most of that money, he wont have a college fund because I still have to get him clothes that fit and school supplies. And so the father is screwed . And remember this a few minutes of sexual gratification is not worth 18 years of monthly child support payments . However is that right? Especially in our justice system that preaches equal rights. Even though I won in court I lost in the end but what keeps me going is knowing this cant last forever. If you have the kids 7 nights per fortnight, you're assumed to be covering 50% of their costs through direct care. Im trying to get my ex-wife to agree to use a child support trust account in the form of a shared checking account like this one (http://www.mediate.com/articles/if_they_can_do_parenting_plans.cfm) that both parents contribute to in order to provide for the childrens needs, but both our family court judge and her lawyer are balking. Neither one of us is required to pay for college. He went off and got married, now he has 23 kids. This is totally crazy talk. ..child support agenciesare the worst on fathers and treat us like second class parents in Virginia. Especially if the exs make considerably more money than they do? If the custodial parent cant or wont pay to support his or her spawn, then that parent can potentially get welfare. Only your own hatred for the person that burned you. Things are not equal right now, so dont pretend they are. I hear women I would say 97% of the time now saying they need to find a Baby daddy so they can get a new paycheck this is reality what are we going to do about this!!! Mind you the whole time after my daughter was born. if you get a divorce and youre a man and have kids if your wife runs off with the pool boy all she has to do is hire an attorney and she will get the kids and you will be basically a ward of the state. Plus, check out their power-packed Legal Tips page for all parents fighting family court, too Wow!! 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